Monday, October 26, 2009

Plato Jesus' That's Newstastic! (Late Edition)

Due to an editorial gaffe, Plato Jesus' latest collection of That's Newstastics did not make it online when originally scheduled (just after Columbus Day).

"In case you didn't get enough yucks celebrating the genocide of the indigenous in the America's during Columbus Day, here's 9 new Newstastics to make you feel just right," he wrote.

Two weeks ago.

Fortunately our man does not hold a grudge (at least we're hoping not), and what's more, he's used the lag time to surface 6 more Newstastics.

It's that kind of "can-do" spirit that made - and continues to make - this country great.

And now, without further delay:

ready to revolt: oath keepers pledges to prevent dictatorship in the u.s.

gold courses now grow in vietnam's rice fields

one reporter's lonely beat, witnessing executions

ritter's on-air gaffe is tops

colorado newspaper searches for cannabis critic

driver of a la-z-boy lounged a bit too long

note to gunrunners: don't use gmail

tackles of michael vick could mean food for animal shelters

mission impossible: peacekeeping in somalia

the gay sons of allah: wave of homophobia sweeps the muslim world

s.c. candidate hosts 'machine gun social,' 'ak-47 giveaway'

hikers: eat bananas - but take your skins home

gadget to help women feign virginity angers many in egypt

U.S. speeding up delivery of bunker-buster bomb; denies iran is the reason

CMMG tactical bacon